Tuesday, May 21, 2013

What's in an IQ?

Recently a friend asked if I had ever gotten mine or Jack's IQ tested. Along with another interesting looking book, she suggested I do it, as it is known that those with higher IQ's think and act differently. I'd never done it, but with all my recent test taking, I figured why not. It could help to provide more answers. It could also raise more questions.

On Sunday I set out to find some online tests. (I'm sure going and getting a professional test is a bit more accurate but with everything else going on, I simply don't have a lot of extra money to dish out. ) Just as with the Aspergers tests I took multiple tests. Five to be exact. I'm not sure if it's my own lack of trust in general, but one is never enough. I have to try to disprove myself. If I can't then I can usually accept the answer.

Three of the tests were free. Two charged a nominal fee and were quite a bit more extensive. I was actually a little worried to start with because of the math and the word problems. Both make my head want to explode. I hate math. But, apparently just because I hate something, doesn't mean I can't do it. Which then reminded me of Jack saying..."Just because I'm good at something, doesn't mean I like it!" Excellent point, Young Jedi.

Between them all I scored in the range of 136-144, in the Gifted category, with the score of 144 being only one point below Genius. I settled in between on the Test below.

What does this mean exactly?  I'm smahhht, but I have absolutely no social or relationship skills? I should have invested my time and life in learning rather than in people and emotions that I can't identify or even deal with?  

I have no idea, except that now I would like to get a professional test, again to try to disprove myself. I would also like to have Jack tested as well and am hoping that is part of the Full Evaluation I'm setting up for him. It can't hurt to know. It might shed some light on some of those areas that have previously been in the dark. 

Last night he was telling me he's starting to worry about another writing piece he's working on at school. Again, his writing is where he exceeded expectations on his report card. But the exact problem he has is never quite clear until I do more digging. It's not the actual writing he's worried about. He has guidelines to follow for each paragraph, but he said that in his head he already knows what he wants to write and they don't match up with guidelines. Rules. Rules. Rules. His internal fight of having to stick to the rules. I had to explain to him that guidelines aren't rules per say. You don't have to stick to them, they are just there to help you if you need it. If you don't need it, then by all means, write what's in your head! Most kids don't have their paper pre-written in their brain, so they need to do it with help. 

It's always like this with him though. The problem goes deeper than what you see on the surface. The problem is sometimes the opposite of what you'd expect it to be. 

He also exhibited a little bit of what I struggle with constantly. Reading emotions. He said. "Tonight, when we were fishing I was doing something funny and Ryan just looked at me and didn't smile. His face looked mad or sad."  This was a difficult one for me, as I have this same problem for the simple fact that usually Mad and Sad are two completely different looks, but often hard to distinguish. All we know is there is no smiling or laughing. I tried my best to explain saying maybe he was concentrating on fishing. "But he was looking right at me." Maybe he just wasn't listening.  Explaining this is hard as I don't always understand it myself. Another important reason why we need a third party intervention here. In the end I just said that next time he is unsure of what someone is feeling maybe he could ask them. In hindsight, this might have been horrible advice. I do this and it's often met with annoyance. 

I don't have all the answers. I might not even have any of the answers but I keep trying. I'm determined to do whatever I can to make sure Jack can avoid a life of anxiety, panic, and misunderstandings. I'm determined to give him what knowledge and coping skills I have and to find him access to those that I don't possess. 

I just quickly thought about what my own mother's response would have been if she read that. "Do you have to look so closely at everything?? I don't get that deep. You worry too much." 

And to that I would say..."No shit. And you never worried enough."

Hope, who wishes a higher IQ could be turned into a higher balance in my checking account. 


  1. I'm not wasting my time on those tests.. I know I'm stupid!

  2. I had no idea what I would score and secretly thought..."if I'm stupid I'm not telling anyone." :) I do think these kinds of tests have more to do with how your brain works rather than how intelligent you are or how much knowledge you can retain. I could be wrong though. Oh wait...scratch that. I'm never wrong.

  3. Exactly. My point is my brain doesnt work!